Floyd!?

So I've found out that my cousin (Let's call him Floyd in case he discovers the "portal to the intenetteds" and I would hate for my rant to embarrass him.) is now married.  Floyd. The man who would offer to eat oddities for beer money.  The man who never met an itch he wouldn't scratch in public and who once said to me "David Lee Roth don't need them Van Halen assholes."


Don't get me wrong,  I'm actually pretty happy for Floyd and if he's found someone whom he loves and loves him in return, that's a beautiful thing.  I'm not jealous or resentful;  it's just difficult to put my initial reaction into words. 


Just... Floyd?!?


I was counting on Floyd.  As the only other bachelor in the entire family (Not including "Earl" who can now get married in several states), Floyd gave me a cushion. I had padding.  I had time and a distraction to all of my aunts, elders and married friends. "Go pick on Floyd, he's not married either!"  


Yes I verbally kneecapped Floyd on more than one occasion. If you knew my family, you would too. Don't judge me.


Oh the devious machinations this will put into motion.... Thank goodness the holidays are past so I do not have to fear the "fix-up, the set-up and the mix-up" for awhile yet.  (See my October 2010 'He's Single' entry for details.) 


I don't really have much contact with my father's side of the family anymore but I can practically smell the smoke from the phone lines crossing the country, from the Southland to central California back to the Southland and finally to here.


"Floyd got himself hitched. When is Grim going to get married??"


"He's too old to still be a bachelor!"


"Is he catting around? Fornicator!"


"Well you know how they live out there, they're all hippies."


"I will put his name on the church's prayer list and we will pray for his wicked, wicked soul!"


And so on... and so on...


Basically Floyd just made my life a little more difficult for the interim. So if you see a child with overly large gums, permanent baby teeth and hair in places no human should have growth, that'll be my new second cousin, Floyd Jr. or little Floydette.


And all kidding aside, Floyd is really a terrific guy and will make a heck of husband.  He's loyal, trustworthy and generous. I really do wish him all of the happiness in the world.


Damn it.


Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da, Life goes on.


Thank you for taking the time to read.

I Do Not Tolerate You. I Accept You.

Roman philosopher Boethius once said "Who would give a law to lovers? Love is unto itself a higher law."

New York state is one vote shy of passing a law making it legal for same sex marriage. For the life of me I cannot fathom why this issue is being put to the whim of the states when so called "traditional" marriage is Federally recognized.

Why does it matter, it's just a piece of paper right? Wrong. It's a glaring symbol of inequality. Marriage is recognized and afforded rights with regards to taxes, property, benefits, loans and legal standing. This dear reader, is exactly taxation without representation or benefit. This is legislated discrimination. You cannot bestow rights of some; they must be for all to all.

Hospitals for instance can still prevent a loved one from gaining information or to be allowed at the bedside of a patient if not legally recognized. No one should spend their final hours alone and afraid, facing their own mortality and being judged a pariah by society. I can think of no greater tragedy than being separated from a loved one when my presence was needed most. Could you?

Life can be cold, brutal and often cruel. If you for even a moment have someone to spend your time with; someone who makes you happy then you should feel blessed. You should revel in the fact that in a world of billions, you've been chosen by fate and found someone special and in turn who wants you. Love is an incredibly rare and precious thing; something the government should have no involvement whatsoever. You should not be made to feel ashamed of your relationship and certainly not fearful for your safety.

I fail to understand how someone can have the unmitigated gall to presume the existence of their own relationship can be endangered by accepting the rights of others. If you truly believe that traditional marriage is somehow lessened by legalizing gay marriage, then your faith in that union must not be very strong. Marriages fail and relationships falter. Gay marriage will prove no different. Some will divorce, others will share a lifelong commitment growing old together. Homosexuals are people, after all.

We are all human beings with an incredible potential for compassion yet we sometimes take for granted what makes us human beings to begin with. Love. Love is living being, too. It breathes, it can starve, it can wither and it can soar. It can inspire to overcome almost any obstacle with the mere hope of its existence and yet be as fragile as glass. It's priceless and should be treat as such.

Even if the law is not passed either at the state or federal level, don't let a piece of paper define you or your relationship.

You have value. You have worth. Never forget that.

Thank you for taking the time to read.